The time a friend told me how much he hates potatoes....while eating French fries and I literally blew his mind by telling him French fries are potatoes..

Coworker bought a low-flow shower head. He filled the BATHTUB using the new low-flow shower head BECAUSE IT WOULD USE LESS WATER!

When a dumb as a brick girl that I went to high school with asked our history teacher if she’d ever owned a slave.

Rescued a coworker on the side of the road with a flat tire, waiting for the tow truck, I pointed out the nail at the top of their tire. They scoffed and looked at me like I was the stupidest person in the world and exclaimed that’s not true bc it’s flat at the bottom I just walked away and never brought it up again

This was my first experience in retail where I learned what many customers would be like. Seasons were changing, so we put a lot of shirts we had to get rid of in the front and made them 50% off. I was working the register when a woman came up to buy her things. I rang her up and could see a look on her face like something was wrong. That’s when the following happened. Lady: “Why is this so much.” Me: “Pardon me?” Lady: “This should only be $10 not $20.” I thought that maybe her item was on sale, so I asked if she could point out the sign because I wasn’t aware of it. It was a small store and we didn't have to walk anywhere. Lady: “This sign here.” Me: “This sign says that all shirts are 50% off.” Lady: “Yes, so why is this full price.” Me: “This is a hat.”

I was once asked how it felt to come to the US as a refugee (I'm from Germany). She then looked rather surprised when I told her that Hitler has been dead for 75 years and that Germany is one of the more liberal countries in the world these days. She full on thought I fled Nazi Germany.

Dated a guy~ we watched TITANIC.... he thought the movie was stupid because the boat sank. It wasn’t believable. You can’t recover from that. Ever

I locked my purse with my keys and cell phone in my apartment. I went to the office to ask maintenance to let me in. The woman at the desk said she would call maintenance and asked for a phone number they could reach me at. I said there wasn’t one because my cell phone was locked in my apartment. She insisted she needed a number. I said I could give her the number but that I wouldn’t be able to answer if they called. She suggested I get my phone out of my apartment so that I could answer when they called. I rolled my eyes at her and said if I could get in my apartment to get my cell phone I wouldn’t need maintenance to let me in. She never did understand me. But maintenance did show up ten minutes later.

I got a concussion a while back. A friend of mine told me not to come close because it might be contagious. They weren't kidding.

I worked at a restaurant and we had a dish that was just a whole grilled chicken, chopped into pieces. A woman who ordered for delivery called us, absolutely scathing, complaining that her order of one whole chicken only contained TWO chicken breasts. Had to explain to grown ass woman that chicken only have two breasts.

I worked at a pet store in college. This customer asked me which food would make his pit bull “swole.” I suggested a high protein food with a good amount of exercise but advised that a lot of it was determined by the dog’s genetics. He asked me if we sold genetics.

Back when the Fukushima nuclear power plant disaster happened we were discussing how the reactor had failed in a science class. 5 minutes into the conversation a girl piped up and said "I don't see what the big deal is. Why can't we just regrow it?" She dead ass thought a nuclear power plant was... A plant

I’m an identical twin, and have been asked all manner of utterly ridiculous questions about it throughout my life. But I think the stupidest was when a girl once asked me “do you ever get yourselves mixed up with each other?” I responded “are you asking me if I ever sometimes think I’m my brother?” she replied, “yeah.” No. I don’t.

Dude burned down his convenience store for an insurance claim, and stopped the milk and bread deliveries the day before.

I used to work with a girl who was sweet but so dumb. We were in a meeting once and somehow someone mentioned baked ham. My manager said "Ugh I hate ham. It looks like human flesh." The girl I mentioned was sitting next to me and looked horrified and whispered "Does ham really come from people?"

I work for Parks Canada in Yoho National Park. I have been asked the question (seriously), “Where do you keep the animals at night?” twice in my career. To this day I still find great joy imagining what they thought was going on each night as we “collected” every large animal in the Parks.

There was a girl in my high school who forced the teacher to pause a documentary about people living in mud huts in Africa because she was upset that they were showing us fictional movies in a history class. It took everyone else in the room to convince her that people actually live like that in some places. Wealthy area living for ya.

I was friends with with a guy who believed those fake apple adverts like "Apple Wave - Microwave your phone for instant battery charge" I was so dumbfounded that he actually fell for it. When I saw him the week after and he had a new phone it all clicked for me

Knew a girl in middle school that didn't understand the concept of perspective She also thought North was whichever direction you were facing at the time

I once worked in a midwestern grocery store deli and I was trying to explain to a woman that the name brand and generic brand of the macaroni salad that we carried were in fact identical. The woman yelled at me saying she could only have the generic brand because “one is made with mayo and the other is made with mayonnaise and I don’t like mayo”. When I tried to explain that mayo is an abbreviation of mayonnaise, she just said “I’m from the south, I know my food” and tutted away.

My wife's cousin and her husband/not-baby-daddy-of her-unborn-child fell on self induced hard times and needed a place to stay for a bit. We setup a queen sized air mattress in the living room for them. For 3 weeks I woke up to go to work and every morning saw them sleeping on it sideways with their legs hanging off the edge. Then one day she asked me to buy her a bigger air mattress because this one was hard on their backs. I told her to turn her body (the f**king thing even has a built in pillow on one end). Her response was that then they couldn't see the TV. THEN F**KING TURN THE AIR MATTRESS TO FACE THE TV! That's the story of how I became an asshole to the trailer trash side of the family. The bad part is that its only one of many stories. The husband was a cook at Applebee's. The baby daddy was a cook at Applebee's, and her new husband was......another cook from the same f**king Applebee's. All working together.

I moved to the UK from Germany. A guy asked me if we had colours in Germany.

Ex flatmate cancelled the gas and electricity contract because it was too expensive. Wondered why we had no more electricity nor gas. She thought we paid 90€ a month to get a hotline 24/7 in case of problem.

I had to explain to a girl why you couldnt grow your hair down in front of your face and just cut out eye holes. Even explaining it her she couldnt grasp it and brushed me off as being "too smart."

In high school I met a boy who asked me for a hygienic cloth because he thought he had a period, actually he only sat on a melted popsicle

Had someone ask me “is Europe on Earth?”

My sister asked if the Eiffel Tower was in Paris or France and couldn't understand how it could be in both... Edit: Woah. My top rated comment is me announcing one of my sister's airhead moments haha. I feel like I need to defend her now. This happened when she was like 14. She's 26 now. She went on to graduate from college and graduated top of her class. She later clarified that she meant to ask if the Eiffel Tower was in Paris or elsewhere in France but she clearly didn't say it like that. She's gonna kill me when I tell her how much attention this got.

Classmate was convinced that winning the lottery is 50% chance because you either win it / not in last year of highschool

She thought the capital of Saudi Arabia was “hummus” I wish I could make this up

I went to a church youth group about five years ago (I’m an atheist so I went with a friend). The group I was in was talking about Jesus when this one girl piped up to say: “Imagine how hard it was for Jesus. I mean, he was Jewish, so he didn’t even believe in himself!” I have no idea what that girl was talking about, but not a goddamn day goes by when I don’t think of that. Then there was the pastor who seemed to believe Scientology was a religion devoted to knowledge and science, but that’s another story.